Feeling Lonely This Halloween?
I’ve always found that Halloween can be a little hit-or-miss for me. Between trick-or-treating, costume parties, and haunted houses, there can be a whole lot of pressure to go out and “do stuff.” (I will say, however, and this may horrify some of you, I am a BIG FAN of candy corn. Like I totally love the stuff!)
But if you’re someone struggling with loneliness, this time of year can be tough—it can shine a spotlight on all the things you don’t have. The pressure to be social and “have fun” is at its peak, and it can feel like you’re the only one missing out. Trust me, you’re not alone in feeling this way, even if it seems like everyone else is out there living it up.
In reality, Halloween doesn’t have to be about big gatherings to be meaningful. Whether you’re solo or just not into the party scene, there are so many ways to enjoy the season in a way that feels right for you. Let’s talk about how you can embrace this time of year and find connection, even if it’s not in the traditional sense.
Here are a few ideas to help you shift your mindset and find joy, even if you’re feeling a bit blue this time of year:
1. Focus on What You Have
Loneliness often tricks us into believing we’re missing something big. It makes us hyper-aware of what we don’t have—a party invite, a group of friends, a relationship—and it’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking, “If only I had this, I wouldn’t feel so alone.” But here’s the thing: loneliness often isn’t about what we’re missing but rather how we’re framing what we have.
Instead, try shifting your focus to what’s present in your life, even if it’s just small things: a supportive friend you can call, a favorite comfort food, a cozy space in your home. Practicing gratitude can help change the narrative from “I’m all alone” to “There are things in my life that bring me joy and peace.” Even if it’s something as simple as having a good book or your go-to playlist, recognizing what you do have can make a world of difference.
2. Make Modest Plans, Even If They’re Simple
Feeling left out because your plans don’t involve an epic Halloween party? Don’t sweat it. Plans don’t have to be grand to be meaningful. In fact, some of the most satisfying activities are the quiet ones. Carve out some intentional time for yourself, and plan something that brings you a sense of peace or fulfillment.
You could have a creative night to paint, journal, or sketch. Or settle in with your favorite Halloween movies and make some festive snacks. You could also use the evening to dive into a book you’ve been wanting to read. Modest plans can often be the most rewarding because they allow you to lean into what you genuinely enjoy rather than what you feel you “should” be doing.
3. Don’t Underestimate the Joy of a Small Gathering
Just because you’re not attending a huge Halloween bash doesn’t mean you can’t feel connected. Sometimes, a smaller gathering with one or two close friends can be just as fulfilling—if not more. You get to have those deeper conversations, share your favorite moments from the year, or simply enjoy each other’s company.
If you’re feeling up to it, invite a friend over for a movie night or a simple dinner, or even just go for a coffee together. Small gatherings can foster more intimate, genuine connections, and those can be the moments that stick with you long after the season is over.
4. Come Up with Your Own Traditions
Halloween can be whatever you want it to be. Maybe you’re not into the scary side of things, and that’s perfectly okay. You don’t have to follow traditional norms to find joy in the season. Create your own traditions that feel more like you.
Not a fan of haunted houses? Start a tradition of going on a scenic autumn walk or baking something delicious. Not big on costumes? Host a pumpkin-carving night or organize a small gathering for board games. Or, just go to the store to buy a big bag of candy corn and go to town, LOL. Remember, holidays are what you make them. Traditions are personal, and you have the freedom to build ones that feel special and meaningful to you.
5. Give Back and Volunteer Your Time
When we’re feeling lonely, it’s easy to get caught up in our own heads. One of the most effective ways to break out of that spiral is to focus outward. Volunteering or giving back in some way not only helps others, but it also gives you a sense of purpose and connection.
Look into local opportunities like helping out at a community Halloween event, passing out candy in your neighborhood, or spending time with animals at a shelter. Doing something kind for others can be a powerful antidote to loneliness, reminding you that you’re part of something bigger and making a positive impact in the lives of others.
Lastly, loneliness doesn’t define you. It’s normal to feel isolated, especially during a holiday that brings expectations of connection. Acknowledge your feelings and know they’re valid. Consider reaching out to a therapist or a support group if loneliness has been weighing on you heavily. Sometimes just talking to someone who understands can make all the difference. Remember that holidays can be difficult for so many people, even if it doesn’t look that way from the outside.
Halloween doesn’t have to be just about parties and costumes—it can also be a time for self-care, connection, and personal growth. Loneliness is tough, but it’s something we can navigate by finding comfort in unexpected places and being gentle with ourselves along the way.
This year, I encourage you to create your own Halloween experience—one that feels authentic and fun for you. You deserve a holiday that brings you joy, even if it’s in small moments. Whether that’s inviting a friend over for a movie, coming up with your own traditions, or simply enjoying some Halloween treats, make this season yours. 🎃
BTW, my mission is help people love their lives so they never want to leave them.
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