Everytime around this year I have a mild freak out: “How is it already May 7? Like whoa there 2024, can you please just chill? I am still working on the goals I set for myself in January! Wasn’t it only February like a week ago?!”

But then I remember that May is Mental Health Awareness Month AND Asian Heritage Month and I'm like, :::smirk::: this is SO my month! I mean It’s pretty much the superbowl if you’re Filipina AND a therapist, ha!

If you’re dealing with the “I can’t believe it’s already May” scaries, I feel your pain. Keep reading to learn how to cope with them better.

Have you ever felt lonely despite being in a crowded room? Or felt lonely in your romantic relationship even though you had a loyal and committed partner? There are times in my life when I’ve felt incredibly lonely - from the time I transferred schools in 4th grade, all the way to when I first moved to Lisbon.

Going remote and becoming a digital nomad was scary, but worth it. Like CRAZY worth it.

In 2015, therapists practicing remotely was practically unheard of. Some therapists thought it was sacrilege. Many thought I was crazy.

Then, when I started combining global travel with my remote therapy practice in 2018, it felt like a whole new world. Being a remote therapist without a physical office has changed my life for the better in so many ways:

Everyone gets lonely. And while it sucks, it’s nothing to be embarrassed about. You can feel this way even if you’ve done nothing wrong.

Loneliness is the experience of lack in relationships - of something missing that should be there. Perlman and Peplau define loneliness as “a mismatch between the quantity and quality of relationships we have, and those that we want.”

Today I’m telling you a story I’ve never shared publicly about when something in my life went horribly wrong. When I was in high school, like many first born overachieving type-A daughters, it was my DREAM to go to an ivy league school. You have never met a more driven individual than young me, and this obsession goes way back.

Like many of you, I’m in a torrid love affair with travel. Every social media account I have is bogged down with folders of what to see, eat, and do in my next 25 dream destinations. While getting me to share on social media is often like pulling teeth, when I’m on a trip I become a pretend food and travel influencer and take great pains to catalog every meal, every beautiful vista, every beautiful smile I encounter.

It's not easy to navigate how to support someone going through a tough time. We often want to offer help but may not know the right thing to say or do. That's where the classic and wildly popular phrase, "Let me know if you need anything," comes in. When I hear it, it virtually makes me twitch. And listen, I know It’s something said by the most lovely, most well-intentioned people out there. It’s something I used to say all the time too.

In my therapy office, one of the topics that comes up time and again is the struggle to make the "right decision." We have to make so many decisions in life, and things are so rarely black and white so it’s normal to wonder if we're always making the best call.

But here's the thing I’ve learned: there's almost never just one right answer. Life is messy, complex, chaotic, but also beautiful and surprising. And while we can't always control the outcome of our decisions, there's one question that can help us navigate the uncertainty with a little more clarity and confidence.

So, you're a therapist thinking about diving into the world of telehealth. As someone who has been doing this for nearly 10 years, let me tell you, there’s a LOT I’ve learned along the way and so many things I wish I knew sooner.

Looking back on my journey, despite the things I learned the hard way, the lessons I’ve gained are worth their weight in gold. If you’re thinking about becoming a remote therapist, I’m going to share with you what took me nearly 10 years to figure out so you don’t have to.

You know, life has this funny way of keeping us on our toes. I originally wrote this post about how to find peace in chaos back in 2020, which was undoubtedly one of the most turbulent years of our collective existence. I wanted to write something to address the question “How in the world can we possibly find peace when it feels like the world is falling apart?” 

I love getting extra stuff. I remember in college I would occasionally go to this legendary pizzeria in Berkeley called I love getting extra stuff. I remember in college I would occasionally go to this legendary pizzeria in Berkeley called Cheeseboard Pizza Collective. (Yeah, you’re definitely going to want to bookmark it.) Everyday, they’d make only one type of vegetarian pizza and it was always the most incredible thing you’d ever tasted. And everyday, you’d get in a long line to wait your turn for a slice of the good stuff. The first time, I remember being completely delighted to make it past the glass doors into the shop to be greeted by the buzzing electricity of a 3 piece jazz band. (How utterly refined!) 

A message if you feel like your love life sucks

Last week we spoke about how learning to nurture healthy relationships is important for thriving - whether you’re partnered or not. But what if you’re just single and unhappy about it? What then? (By the way if that’s not you, this email may not be for you so feel free to skip this one, or read on if you’re curious anyway!) 

Have relationships that last even longer than your Stanley Bottle.

Ahhh Valentine’s Day, you tricky bi**h. Valentine’s Days of my past have been an anxiety-inducing jack-in-the-box of surprises. Some were filled with flowers, cards, and romantic gestures, others were spent moping alone on my sofa, and still others have been somewhere in between those two extremes.

In my big disappearing act last year, I totally missed that one of my YouTube videos How to Cope with Loneliness went viral. (Ok, not viral viral, but like 36k views which is a lot for ME). And it made me realize there are so many of us that struggle with loneliness, and while it’s perfectly normal, it can also be very very tough.

You guys have been with me every step of the way when it comes to this book journey,

and I couldn’t be more grateful. Since not all of you were able to attend the book launch in November, I just wanted to share how it actually went!

In a world that celebrates success and achievement, acknowledging the less glamorous side of life can feel like an act of rebellion. We're conditioned to share our wins, to curate a highlight reel that projects an image of seamless success. It’s easy to feel like we're the only ones navigating those times when things just aren't clicking—what I playfully like to call "flop seasons."

In 2023 I completely stopped filming YouTube videos and made a small handful of social media posts. And while I did manage to share a newsletter with you from time to time, you may have noticed even that has been pretty inconsistent. I didn’t have any major life crisis to speak of or some tragedy going on behind the scenes.

So, we often see the holidays as this magical time filled with joy, twinkling lights, and the smell of gingerbread everywhere. But let's keep it real—not everyone's jamming to the same holiday tune. If the festive vibes aren't vibing, it doesn't mean that you’re a total grinch.. Today let's dive into how to navigate this season when everyone expects you to be jolly, even when you're not feeling it.